Tuesday, December 11, 2007

just life

Today really wasnt too bad...went by kind of fast...I hear there is an ice storm headed our way...hopefully they dont call school off tomorrow...Logan is suppose to have his other appointment with the neurologist, but if the roads are too bad there is no way i am going into Kalamazoo...So i have called there office many time to try to get the results of his EEG from over a month ago, and i get no answer at all...they tell me that i have to call the doctor who ordered the test...and the doctor office who ordered the test tells me that they dont ahve it, because the test was done in kalamazoo...someone needs to tell me what the heck is going on with my child before i storm the office with a major fucking attitude...

The boys are all sick with a cold and cough...I sure hope it dosnt turn into what i was sick with...ugh, i would feel so bad for them...its been 2 weeks since my sickies started, and im still feeling a few effects from it...so i hope it ends up being nothing more then a cold...

Nick is gone...headed to his destination...we talked on the phone all Sunday night, till late into the night, then again very early in the morning..needless to say i got 2 hours on tossing and turning sleep...he left monday morning...he asked me on Saturday to be strong for him on Monday because he was gonna be a mess...I hope i did a good job of it for him...I think i am handling it very well...i wanted to be his rock for the day...ive only cried a little...but i think it just hasnt hit me yet...i talked to him at about 3 this morning, he was in alaska...oh man he had to have been freezing..lol, going from Hawaii to Alaska...what a shock to the system...Im scared for him being over there...and when i really sit down to think about the situation, my heart starts to race and i get all light headed...ive been trying hard not to think about where he is going, and the danger he could be in...its gonna be a long 15 months for us, including the boys, who have grown to love him very much...

so, im off to do some laundry...anything to keep myself busy at this point...but sooner or later i am gonna have to let myself sit down and have a good cry..im just not ready yet...

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