Saturday, September 19, 2009

music in my soul

im sitting here tonight...alone..Nick is with his brothers, so im forced to entertain myself...not so bad really...there was a Bob Seger tribute band playing in town tonight, and i could hear it from my front porch...music is memories to me...i love it..all kinds...but music from Seger, and the eagles takes me back to my childhood...my family is full of the hippie types, and we use to have bon fires, and spend a good amount of time together...what i remember most is the bonfires, and parties where this genre of music was played...listening to it tonight brings tears to my eyes...it reminds me of my uncle Dan mostly..he has been gone for 3 years now...He was my favorite..a wild child or sorts...didnt care what others thought...a little bit crazy...and alot loveable...he was well known in Lawton as "animal"...

i know i just did a blog like this one, but for some reason lately, im really feeling the lose of the ones who have passed in the last 3 years...there have been alot...people i was very close to....some very important things are about to happen in my life, and they wont be here for it...it makes me sad...but mostly i think im sad for the way some parts of my family have become...i know they had their fights, but i want us to be close...its important to me...i just dont know where to begin to find that again...

im emotional tonight anyway, im dealing with a fear, and that never sits well with me

1 comment:

Erin S. said...

I hear you. I am there as well...
In a weird way though it helps to know that everyone seems to be going through something. It helps me feel more connected and like there may just be a light at the end of the tunnel. OR I am just mentally ill. ;-p