Sunday, December 13, 2009

Moving

Yes we are.

A little back story...

about 3.5 years ago I let the ex husband mortgage my house, so that he could start buying houses to fix up and sell. Well he bought one, started fixing it, and ive heard through the grapevine that he will be keeping it. When he mortgaged it he promised financially things would be better, and that he would have an easier time paying the things he is suppose to pay (child support). He was suppose to consolidate all of his bills, and from what i hear, he didn't do that either. I feel stupid for trusting him. He has defaulted on it twice, and this last time didn't tell me till the amount was too high for us to fix. I know times are hard, but why did he not tell us. This is my childrens home. The home i have had for them for 11 years as of this February. Well he is trying to make a deal with us now, that he will save money for the next 6 months (when we have to be out of here), and then help us with a down payment for a "new and better house for me and the boys". First i see lots of problems with that. With a foreclosure in our names how is that even possible? and I haven't received more then 500 in child support in 6 months, so the way i see it, instead of paying child support he will save that money , the boys money, and try to took like a hero? um, no. oh, and the stipulation is, that is only if we stay in the bangor area. an area i cant stand, and that is far away from where Nick and I work? I am not having any of that. he says he is only doing what is best for the boys.. if that were the case, the house would have been paid on. If he didn't have the money, he should have told us.

I am bitter about it all, but I am starting to see the silver lining. There is something positive in every situation. We get to move out of a house that leaks, and is cold all winter long. a house that is falling apart (even though its been "redone"). We get to be closer to our families, we don't have to drive 45 minutes each way to work, or to go do something enjoyable. It will save us gas money, and bills because we can live in a place that is taken care of.

I am trying to see this is a new and exciting adventure. I am nervous, actually i am a mix of a lot of strong emotions. I don't know how i am going to feel from one day to another, and it makes me moody and irritable some days. I find myself snapping at Nick, and i don't mean to, but im so freaked out about it all. The boys will have to change schools, something none of us have had to deal with before, they have been in the same school district all their lives. I think i am more nervous about it then they are. I don't know how it all works. I am scared that a new school wont understand them the way this one does. But i think in all, a move will be good for them too. It will give them a chance to start over. to make a decision to do better. i think it will be a great adventure, with lots of new friends and opportunities for them.

I have a feeling the ex will try to stop this somehow. i am not sure how, but im just sure of it. but the fact that no child support has been paid, and he failed to follow court order and pay his mortgage, which resulted in us losing the only home my boys have known will work in my favor anyway. besides the fact that i am a good mom, and there is nothing to say im not :) well im sure some select people would disagree, but i dont care about them at all, so it dosnt matter

So anyway, that's whats going on in my life.

I say it was a stupid decision to make, but my mom says that as long as i learned something from it, then it wasn't stupid

1 comment:

A.C. Fisher Aldag said...

Sorry to hear about this, Tara.

AbsoLUTEly do NOT let him save up the money. He can darn well give it to you, and YOU can save it up all by yourself. He is NOT trustworthy.