Wednesday, December 25, 2013

Merry Christmas

I love Christmas time, but it can be so very stressful.  This year especially.  Not only am I working full time now, but also taking classes.  I feel like my patience is thinly spread this season.  I can only stretch so far on my time, before I am late for everything.  My assignments should come first at this point, but I find myself putting them off because I feel guilty secluding myself in the office to do my work, when my family wants to spend time with me. 

With that being said, we had an amazing Christmas.  This was the first time in a long time that we were able to spoil the boys a bit.  It felt good.  I know they don't need to be spoiled to be happy, but I wanted nothing more than to get them what they really wanted this year.  And we did.  Financially it has been a rough couple of years, but after me getting a full time job, it is all coming together nicely.  We are catching up on bills, and that feels amazing.  I still stress a little every month, but not as bad.  Our landlord has been kind, but frustrated, and we are finally close to being completely caught up with him.

This is the last week that I will have more than one class for a while.  I decided that two at a time is too much.  My classes are only 8 weeks long, and I do the same amount of work in 8 weeks, that most people would do in 12-16 weeks.  It has been a very stressful few months, and now that I know what to expect, I know not to take more than one at a time.

Sunday, December 8, 2013

So very overwhelmed!

I knew school would be hard, but.....DOES IT HAVE TO BE THIS HARD!  Whew, now that I got that out of my system.

I am taking online classes at American Public University.  I do love it.  It is so challenging, and it it keeps me guessing for sure. 

Write now I am taking and English class, and a Native American History class.  In my English class, I have to write 2 forum posts, and 4 responses every week, plus whatever essay they give us to write.  In my history class, I have to write an essay a week, plus write in the forums, and write whatever additional essays we are assigned, plus whatever reading assignment they have given us..OMG!

haha, with that being said, I really am enjoying it, but I am a bit overwhelmed and I think I will only be doing one class at a time for a while.  especially when it involves writing so much.  I am trying to find a way to keep each class organized on a timeline, so that I do not get confused about what is due, and when. 

Friday, November 15, 2013

Did You Miss Me?

I have missed writing in this blog, and I hope that I didnt lose everyone by not writing.  Life has just been so crazy lately.  So many things have changed.  Life is moving in the right direction, and I am so excited about all the changes.  Well, most of them anyway.

First, I got a new job.  I had mixed feelings about for a while.  I had been with Rapid Refill for 4 years, and I loved my job.  I enjoyed working for the owners, and it was so very hard to tell them I was leaving.  They cut my hours down to 24, and I just couldnt live on that.  I told them I would have to find a 2nd job, and I did try for a few months, but everyone wanted me to have open availability.  Then this full time job popped up, and it was such a blessing.  I work in an office, for a company that makes lighting for RV's and trailers.  I LOVE IT.  There is a lot for me to learn, as I have never worked in this industry before.  It is an amazing job, and my coworkers are so helpful.  It has always been a hope that I would eventually work in an office environment, and here I am!  It is full time, so that is why I had to leave Rapid Refill.  I do miss it, I miss seeing my regular customers, and I miss the fact that I knew my job, and the product so well.  The full time paycheck has been such  a blessing, and we are getting caught up on things.

The boys are doing amazing.  Michael started highschool, and it was a bit of a frustration at first because he just couldnt figure out the locker.  The combination lock was giving him trouble, but Nick took him in one day and helped him get it figured out.  He has made the transition so well, and I am totally impressed with it.  The 3 younger kids switched to public schools as well.  They are doing so well, it has me questioning the private schools..At any rate, they are all doing fantastic!  All are making friends in the neighborhood, with the exception of Logan. He is not really making friends, and we arent sure why.

Nick is still at the same job.  He has applied to different positions inside the company, all of which he has been overqualified for so far.  He does a job shadowing on Monday, and he is hoping this is the one for him.  I think he is tired, and bored of the paint line and I cant blame him for that one.  He wants to stay with the company, just find a different position.

Now get ready for this one!  I STARTED COLLEGE!  Yep, I finally did it.  I am in my 2nd class now.  I am so excited, and nervous about it all.  Its hard to find the time to do the work, and I didnt expect to be changing jobs as soon as I enrolled for classes.  I am doing it online, and it is a lot of work.  It keeps me very busy.  It is hard, but it will pay off in the end.  I am going in for accounting.  Its a four year degree.  A huge commitment for sure.

My mom had a slip and fall accident in June.  They did surgery on her neck 6 weeks ago because of it.  She has been off work for a while, cant drive, and because of the neck brace, she has to have someone there after to change the pads on the brace.  So, I have been taking care of her as well. 

Life has been so busy for me it feels like i barely have time to breath.

Tuesday, April 30, 2013

My insecurities

I don't know at what point in my life I started to be such an insecure person.  You can bet, if it is annoying to me, it is definitely annoying to my husband, and anyone else around me.  I actually feel bad for him because of it.

I am actually thinking about making a doctors appointment to talk to them about my mood swings and anxiety.  Its freaking me out a bit.  Bipolar and depression run in my family, and I am so afraid it might be something like that.

I can go from zero to bitch in the blink of an eye.  I can feel it coming on, and removing myself from the situation doesn't make it any better.  I need help.  Any suggestions?  Anything natural you can think of that might help me?

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Create Your Life

I know I don't blog as much as I use to.  I have all of these ideas in my head, but by the time I get to a computer, the creativity is gone.  I hope I still have people out there that read this :)

I keep hearing people complaining that life has dealt them a raw deal.  The poor me, spoiled American attitude is just not my style.  Would I like to be comfortable financially without having to really work for it?  No, not me.  I believe in working hard for what you have.  Do I complain sometimes, YES.  But not because I expect life to hand me things without the hard work that comes with it.

My husband and I work very hard for what we have, and do not blame others, or the government for our misfortunes.  Most of the time, the things that come our way, are our own doing.  Cause and effect . Do we wish things were easier?  Yes, its human nature to want things.  Until we change our ways as human beings, we will not be happy in life, because we are always wanting more, and until we get more more more, we are miserable creatures.

Create a different you.....
Think positive
Work hard
Be grateful for what you already have
Stop looking for the greener grass (water your own lawn)
Spend wisely.
Change your habits

If you don't like the way your life is going, change directions.  That curve ball that life just threw your way.....That was meant to wake you up.

I do not believe our lives are predetermined.  I believe we are in control of what the future holds for us.  Come from a bad back ground? Have a better future.  Is that road you are traveling down too bumpy for you, lay down the pavement and find a better future.

Don't believe that life owes you.  You owe life.  Volunteer, do things for other people.  Change, and recreate your way of thinking. Until you decide to create your own life, the fate of it is in the hands of the people you put it in.

I would love for things to be a little easier, but such is life.  We do what we can, and live within our means.  When we can learn to do that, maybe we will truly be at peace.

Tuesday, January 8, 2013

A Mash Up of Everything

I keep thinking about this blog, and it feels a little like a neglected child! I am so sorry for only posting every few months. I always think about getting on here, and doing a post, and then time slips away from me, and a new day begins.

Life is pretty good right now.  As always, financially it could be better, but in the family way, its good :)  I miss my blogging, and I have been a bad blogger, and not kept up with the blogs I follow.  I miss reading them.  Hopefully soon I can catch up with all that.

The boys are doing fantastic.  We have made a huge decision regarding their schooling.  We have decided to take them from the Charter school that they go to, and put them in the public schools in our neighborhood.  I know, some of you will say "what are you thinking", but there is a reason behind the madness I swear.  Most people go from public, to charter, or private.  We have decided the opposite change is important. They are staying in the Charter school until the end of the school year, but after that its time to switch.   Now for the reason.  When we first moved to this area the boys were so far behind they wanted to take them all back a grade.  I talked them out of it, and enrolled them in Paramount, and that school has been such a blessing to us.  Smaller class sizes, so they can get the extra help they need.  Very strict in the rules, and dress code department.  At the time of putting them there, it is what they needed.  They have been there for 3 years now.   We live 15 minutes away, more if your in traffic. Our finances just wont allow us to make this trip any longer.  Twice a day, and then idling while we are waiting in the car pool line.  So finances is one reason, but the biggest one for me is what they are missing out on socially.  Being that I was a social butterfly, and had tons of friends in school, it pains me to see that my children don't   They have absolutely no friends in our neighborhood.  I want them to go to school with kids in our area so that they have that social experience.  None of their friends at school live near us, NONE.  I think it is so important to have friends other than their brothers.  They have really healthy, amazing relationships with each other, and I am so happy for that, but nothing outside the family.  We cant take them to after school functions, because of the cost of gas.  In going to public schools, they will be riding the bus.  It will save so much wear and tear on vehicles, and that is great because we cant afford to replace them when they die on us. I am not explaining this the way I have it in my head.  We have already talked to the boys, and after a very long discussion explaining our reasons, they are all for it.  Nervous, but excited.

Speaking of cars.  We have been down to 1 since March of last year.  Almost a year with a car that seats 5, when we have a family of 6.  It has been a difficult situation.  My work has been very accommodating with it.  They often let me take the Rapid Refill car home if I am closing and opening the next day.  They have been amazing.  This 1 car this has been a pain in the ass.  Especially last month just before Christmas when our car broke down.  We were left with nothing.  Thank goodness for the Angels I call mother and father in law :)  The repairs were expensive, and we didn't have they money.  I don't like owing people, but not having a car was out of the question for a family our size.  They fronted the money to help us out.  Like I said, not a fan of owing people, but they came to the rescue.  I only hope I can get them paid off fast.  We are hoping as soon as our taxes come back to get something.  A 2nd car would be so helpful in our work/school situation.

Work is going well.  I am still working 2 nights a week, and was hoping by now to be down to just days, but it has not happened yet.  I am hopeful that it will.  Perfectly Posh is going well for me.  I am not rocking it the way I would like, but its getting there.  I had my first party in November, and did over $500 in sales, I was so excited for that!.  I have done 3 events with it so far, this last one bringing me a sale. Scentsy is not moving for me, but I have faith that it will.

I haven't made any jewelry in a long time.  I really would like to get back into doing that.  People like what I make, and I get a little money for doing it.

Nick put a bid in for a higher paying job at Stryker.  He interviewed for is yesterday.  He is really hoping to get it.  It will help so much.  Working in a factory is not his dream job, but he seems to be handling it alot better than he was before.

I think the hardest part for me right now is the fact that we are working out tails off, and just barely treading water. I dont want that for us.  I want us to be a little more comfortable financially.  Switching the boys school will save us about 20 a week, so that will help.

My mom is living in an apartment close by.  She seems to like it for the most part, but really wants to be in Arizona.  I dont really know what is holding her back, but I do know she is not happy here.  So I see a move in her future.

Christmas was good.  They boys were with their dad this year, so it didnt really feel like Christmas at all.  I wasnt too excited about it.  I missed my gma, and that was hard for me.  But we got through it.